Category Archives: Haters

A womanizer says “What?”…

The end really drives it home.

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Smize at all the Haters. They’ll wonder if you’re brilliant and sexy or a total nutter.

Always confuse the enemy–There are no lies behind my smize but only I know what the truth is.”  Tyra Banks, Runway War Hero and Military Grade Smizer Extraordinaire, discharged honorably.*

*Please don’t take this quote or take any of the biographical information that it contains to be accurate or true.  OR IS IT?! <smize>

I am going to eat your soul. Or do I just want to lick some leftover powdered sugar off your face from your morning donut, you asshole? YOU WILL NEVER KNOW.

It seems most likely that I’m watching UFO’s fly circles around my head while clamping down my jaw to get fitted for a dental guard. Less likely is that I’m stroking out about how much I hate you.

Do I look shocked enough here to convince you that I give a shit about your story? Well Played, Tyra.

kjajea;lkjicjiajksl.!!;alkdjic.

Smize + Wink = How the fucks?!! She is a witch.

I’ve just lost my goddamn mind but I look FIERCE doing it.

Now, look deep into my crazy eyes—that’s how you do it, bitches!

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Trick Question! Choose wisely…

Which one are you? Skinny, Skinnier or fucking skinniest?  LOL.

Oh sure, the “Curvy” one is the skinny black girl.  This is so insulting on so many levels.  At any rate, I’m the boyish one.  And by boyish I mean this:

No, No, ya’ll… not the sexy drag queen lady… THE PLATE ON A STICK. 

Untitled

Not only do I make a seriously hot plate, I’m also really, really good at MS PAINT.

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A resolution I can keep.

New Year’s Resolution #1:  BE MORE OF A DICK… by playing the heinous board game, “Cards Against Humanity–a party game for horrible people”.  It’s kind of like playing Apples to Apples with that one friend who uses the Anne Frank card for every adjective from “sensual” to “bogus.”  You can buy it or download it for free HERE.

You know who I’m talkin’ about…

I smell burnt toast.

This prank from Brazil is less than a fun shenanigan and more of a WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK IS A PRANK BECAUSE GIVING PEOPLE STROKES IS NOT FUNNY.  I love the laugh track in the background while people are HAVING STROKES.

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Bitches Walk Among Us

Danzig played a show in Austin, Tx. (Nov. 4)– he was a major bitch, wouldn’t play because it was too cold (71°) and demanded crazy things (soup, vitamins, Wendy’s). Read more

‘Member the good old days of devil horns and kitty litter?  Oh oh OH oh oh oh.

 

Danzig ended up playing a shitty,  kroegeroke-ish, 45 min. set which prompted this dude to adorn an adorable home-made, protest t-shirt:

Look at that shit-eating grin!  This anti-fan could probably KO Danzig with his giant thumb.

It’s too bad that everything keeps coming up asshole for Danzig.  He is a true Misfit (and by Misfit I mean a haggard, Sigourney Weaver looking mother-fucker, if she were an angry, lesbian house-wife).

Boo!